Get in Shape Girl

SO. Today I had an appointment with a personal trainer at the gym. While dreading this in MANY ways, I was also hoping that it would provide motivation to get myself back in shape.

After talking with the trainer, and learning the unGodly amount of weight I need to lose, we headed to the training room. And seriously, 10 minutes in I hear a POP! and have instant, AMAZING pain in my right calf.

The trainer tried to help me stretch it out-- which hurt worse. After helping me back to the office he went next door to a physiotherapy office to ask for advice. They weren't sure without seeing me, so he came back and helped me walk (here walk is a strong word... perhaps hobble would be more descriptive) next door. They physio felt my leg and had me flex my foot (which hurts the MOST, btw). He thinks it is probably a stage 2 tear in the calf muscle.

(sigh)

Only me. Honestly, I think I will just stay chunky. It's much less painful.

Not really sure how I will get around at school tomorrow. I had Hubby bring up the crutches... thinking that may be my only option.

(insert a string of expletives here)

Things I Don't Understand...

...and am thus NOT thankful for.

(See how I tied that in to November and the What-I'm-Thankful-For posts?)

Sneaky. I know.

In no particular order:

1. Kale- I mean, it just sounds nasty.
2. Kim Kardashian- and anyone else in her family. I mean why people? There is NO talent there.
3. Reality Shows- especially ones that follow families around. WHO CARES! I have enough drama in my own life-- I sure as hell don't want anyone else's!
4. How to french braid-- this is one that I need to learn! Stupid Elsa making my 4 yr old want a braid everyday! 
5. Basketball-- UGH! Does this sport ever end?
6. This.
7. Toe Socks-- maybe it's just because I have short toes and thus they never worked for me... maybe I'm jealous. Nah... They look ridiculous.
8. Cranberry Sauce-- ok I will be honest here-- not sure I have ever even TRIED cranberry sauce. But I still don't get it. 
9. Minecraft-- What is that nonsense anyway?
10. Why ANY stores (other than maybe gas stations) are open on Thanksgiving. Give it a rest! All that junk will still be there on Friday. Seriously. 

Funny Ha-Ha

Today's gratitude is for people that make me laugh. I honestly think without these comedians I would not make it through life.

Some of my favorite funny people:

Russell Howard: If you aren't familiar with this hilarious Brit, you are missing out. Hubby introduced me to his BBC show Russell Howard's Good News a couple of years ago. We watch it on Youtube and stream it from the UK. Last May Russell was in the US for 5 stand up gigs. We got tickets and saw him in Chicago. We also ran into him/ sort-of stalked him at the Art Institute. We chatted a few mins and I had my picture made with him-- SUPER AWESOME! (Did I mention he's a cutie?!)

Here's an episode of Good News
Seriously. Watch. You won't regret it.

Jenny Dawson (aka The Bloggess): A couple weeks ago I downloaded her book Let's Pretend this Never Happened and I was not disappointed. My review of this book on Goodreads:  totally needed this audio book this week to distract me. And also, I felt like I was just listening to the voice in my head. Like if I'd write that Sh*t down- it could be a sequel. All in all I found it quite comforting.

I also enjoy her blog: The Bloggess

David Sedaris: I am pretty sure that "Sedaris" translates to GENIUS! I adore this man. Everything he writes cracks me up, or makes me feel smarter and better than I did before I read it. Everytime he's in town for a reading, I'm there. I was so nervous when I stayed to get a book signed once that I managed to blurt out statements such as, "My cat's on Prozac!" and "This is my mailman!" (instead of "One of my best friends since HS"). I love to read his books and I LOVE to listen to the audio versions. Some of my MOST fav Sedaris stories include Six to Eight Black Men, The Santaland Diaries, Jesus Shaves, Me Talk Pretty One Day, and The Happy Place.

Recently David was asked to read 50 Shades of Grey on a tour. This was seriously hilarious and almost made me like that God-awful book...  Check it out!

So there you go... That is just a few of many that help get me through this adventure called life. My advice: Laugh. Find something funny in every situation. Sometimes it is the only way to cope.

Baby, it's COLD outside!

This AM it was pretty chilly outside. As we are getting in the car, Miss Priss exclaims, "Mommy, I'm cold! Turn on the toaster in the car!"

I asked if she meant heater.

"NO! The TOASTER!"

Thanks Y'all!

So every year I do the typical "What-I'm-Thankful-For" daily posts... except that I always get behind and usually end up doing 3 or 4 entries with multiple days. Add to the fact that I am fairly certain that I name the same things EVERY year... so what's the point?

Of course I am thankful for friends and family, and awesome co-workers... and the fact I have a job (though some days I wish I didn't...) I appreciate my life, my education, and all the amazing opportunities I have had.

So this year I am not posting daily-- but whenever the mood strikes. And I am aiming my appreciation at the less obvious choices.

• Today I am thankful for wind. It's like a cyclone out there right now and I LOVE it! I love to listen to it whistle and to watch all the leaves swirling around. Wind provides great comedy as well. It is the funniest of all weather options really. Look at people's hair blowing all over the place! And people's facial expressions as they walk facing the wind-- it's like they ate an entire truckload of lemons or something... all squished up. C'mon people. Hilarious.
• I am also thankful for photographs. They help remind me of all the awesome things I do. Seriously- I need them. My memory is shit lately.

That's it for today... this week, as with most, has made my brain feel mushy...